did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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