I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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