You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I need help removing her.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
