Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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