Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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