Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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