trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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