I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
