I got chris browned last night
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize