his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
