Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
