my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
that is very illegal...i love you.
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