she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
