I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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