If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
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