Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
