he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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