I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
