i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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