Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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