yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
