Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
