he puts the penis in happiness.
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
There are leaves in my underwear?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
