So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
