dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
