Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize