Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
