WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
