Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
