the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
