He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize