You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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