How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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