worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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