I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
