I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Slut skills are useful in every country.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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