I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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