at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
what is it with giant penises always finding me
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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