Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
