Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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