Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
