my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
