a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
