i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
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