brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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