garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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