he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
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