Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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