He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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