Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
